Salty

You need to buy salt next time you go to the store.

Is what Mark said.

We have a lot of salt, a whole bag of salt, what do you mean?

Is what I said. 

I don't want weird salt. I don't want shitty foreign salt in a burlap bag!

Is what he said. 

You mean the Ukrainian salt? The sea salt?  Which one is weird.

Is what I said, (but I knew exactly what he meant).

I am a staunch defender of the weird salt, my commie loving heart swells each time I fill the salt cellar, each time I see it sitting in the cupboard looking homely and plain, filled with clumps. 

The austerity of that salt, blesses my heart. 

I ignore it's short comings.

I ignore it's humble brown package.

I want American salt! I want MORTON'S salt, in a cylindrical box, with a metal flip top! 
That Ukrainian salt tastes weird, and the sea salt is too salty!

He what he said.

Now you are just being silly! 

Was my reply.